Son: Mummy, do all fairy tales begin with ‘Once upon a time?’ Mummy: No sometimes they start with, ‘Darling, I have to work a little late at the office tonight!’
Wife: Why in wedding Ceremony girl sits on left and boy on right? Husband: Because according to profit and loss accout all incomes are on right side and expenses on left side.
The person who invented marriage was creepy as Hell. Otherwise how can a person really think of such weird thing like, Hey! yo I love you so much. I’m gonna get the government involved so that you can’t leave me.
Girlfriends are like chocolates, taste Good anytime. Lovers are like PIZZAS, Hot and spicy, eaten frequently. Husbands are like Dal RICE, eaten when there’s no choice
Two soldiers were having a chat during their free time. 1st Soldier: Why did you join the army? 2nd Soldier: I didn’t have a wife and I loved war. So I joined. How about you? Why did you join the army? 1st Soldier: I joined because I had a wife and I loved peace!
Husband standing on the scale, holding his stomach in. Wife: I do not think that is going to help. Husband: Sure it does. How else could I see the numbers?
What men want: A woman who can cook, a woman who earns good money, a woman who loves him and system to make sure that those three women never meet each other!