Wife to her friend: My hubby bought me a Mood ring the other day. When I’m in a Good mood, it turns Green and when Im in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on his forehead!
Wife: Honey, before we got married, you used to give me gifts and expensive jewelry. Husband: Yes… so? Wife: How come you don’t do it anymore? Husband: Have you ever seen a fisherman give worms to the fish after catching it!
The difference between a husband and childbirth is that one can be terribly painful and sometimes almost unbearable, while the other is just having a baby!
Wife : You are extremely impolite. All the time I was talking, you were continuously yawning… Husband : I was not yawning, I was trying to say something!