A person urgently needs

Don’t waste time thinking about your past or future. Better kill some mosquitoes so that you can sleep better!

If ever in your life you are very sad and feel that you have lost everything, I’ll come, hold your hand, take you for walk on a bridge and show you where to jump from.

1. Vodka is made from potatoes. 2. Potatoes are vegetables. 3. Vegetables are good for health. Need I say more!

The Japanese have produced a camera that has such a fast shutter speed it can take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut!

Procrastination? No, I just wait until the last minute to do my work because I will be older, therefore wiser.

Customer: There is only one piece of meat in my plate. Waiter: Don’t worry, Sir! I will cut it in two.