A woman telephoned her local newspaper to let them know that she had just given birth to 18 children. The reporter didn’t quite hear the message and said, Would you repeat that? Not if I can help it, replied the woman.
Boss to an employee: Do you believe in life after Death? Employee: Certainly not! There’s no proof of it, he replied. Boss: Well, there is now. After you left early yesterday to go to your uncle’s funeral, he came here looking for you.