Quote on a husband’s T-Shirt

A newly wedded desperate soldier sends a hand-grenade to his mother-in-law, with a note: Dearest Mom, If you pull this ring, I’ll be able to get 3 days leave.

A guy just yelled at me for texting and driving. I told him to get off my hood and mind his own business.

Everyday same wishes! Are you bored of it? Let it be different this time: Let the devils sing around you, Mummies dance around you, Vampires sit beside you. Have a horrible day!

Girl: What are you doing? Boy: I was working with The Times of India but now I left. Girl: Oh god, why? Boy: It’s very difficult to get up early in the morning everyday and distribute newspapers

Unlike others your brain is a masterpiece. In the left half, nothing is right and in the right half, nothing is left.

The boss got out of a BMW 5 series and a junior employee remarked, Wow Boss, That’s Great! The boss said, If you also work hard, be punctual, put in more hours of work during the weekends and take fewer holidays, I’ll be able to buy an even better car next year!