Before marriage: Roses are red, sky is blue. you are beautiful, I love you. After marriage: Roses are dead, I’m blue. you are my headache, one day I’ll kill you.
Son: Mummy, do all fairy tales begin with ‘Once upon a time?’ Mummy: No sometimes they start with, ‘Darling, I have to work a little late at the office tonight!’
Wife to her friend: My hubby bought me a Mood ring the other day. When I’m in a Good mood, it turns Green and when Im in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on his forehead!
Adam and Eve’s wedding. Adam: I hereby take Eve to be my LAWFUL wedded wife. EVE didn’t hear the ‘L’. . .. … Thus, the misery began and has continued ever since.