I can atleast switch it off

Never hold your farts in. They travel up your spine, into your brain and that’s where you get your shitty ideas from!

Someday you may lose your hair, you may lose your teeth, your money and even lose your mind. But one thing you’ll never loose is your good looks because you can’t lose what you don’t have.

Some idiot in a nightclub came up to me and said, I get 20 times more girls than you do, haha. I replied, 20 x 0 = 0!

Why do you think I SMS you so much? Is it because: I care for you? Or I miss you? Or I love you? Or I need you? It’s because I need an idle person for time pass! Happy April Fool!

Have you ever noticed that a lot of celebrities were pretty ugly as teenagers? This only means that one day, You are going to be pretty famous!

Most people have 5 senses, Some people have 6 senses, But you are blessed with 7 senses, And this extra sense is Non-Sense!