A blonde was riding on a train

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Bushes are red, Trees are red, Oh

McDonalds: The best place to breakup with your girlfriend. There are no sharp knives, forks or heavy plates and you can always hide behind a fat kid!

Never get jealous when seeing your ex-girlfriend or boyfriend with another person. Remember we were taught to give our old toys and clothes to the less fortunate.

When someone touches you and you don’t feel it, it’s Ignorance. When someone touches you and you feel, it’s Love. When nobody touches you but you feel it, it’s Itching.

Customer: There is only one piece of meat in my plate. Waiter: Don’t worry, Sir! I will cut it in two.

I said to a fat girl today, You are a big girl! She replied, Tell me something I don’t know. I said, Salad tastes good.