Faithful husband will go straight

What’s the difference between pleasure and torture? Pleasure is thinking of you and torture is thinking of you too much.

A teenage boy to his father: Here’s my report card and a list I’ve compiled of entrepreneurs who never finished their High School.

A retired sergeant was asked: Well, how do you like civilian life? Terrible, he said gruffly, all those people around and nobody in charge!

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito to her mother. Yes, but be aware, pay attention during the applause.

Next generation Kindergarten poem: Chatting Chatting? Yes Papa! Girlfriend setting? No Papa! Telling lies? No Papa! Open your Whatsapp. Ha ha ha…

A rabbit runs and jumps and lives only for 15 years. A turtle doesn’t run, does nothing, yet lives for 100 years. Moral: Exercise is hell! Just sleep well!