Boy: Mom, please give me a glass of water.
Mom: You come and drink it yourself.
Boy: Please Mom…
Mom: If you repeat, I’ll slap you.
Boy: When you come to slap me, bring water for me!
He was a good man. He never smoked, drank and had no affair. When he died, the insurance company refused the claim. They said, he who never lived, cannot die!
A brain walks into a bar and says, I’ll have a pint of beer please. The barman looks at him and says, Sorry, I can’t serve you. Why not?, asks the brain. The barman retorts, Because you’re already out of your head.