Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he’ll fall asleep before you finish.
Wife: If I dismiss the cook and make the food myself for a month, what will you pay me? Husband: I won’t have to pay you, you’ll get my entire insurance amount.
The world’s thinnest book has only one word written in it: Everything and the book is titled: What Woman Want!
Alcohol is the worst thing in the world. My friend had a lot last night and ended up saying – I love you to his own wife!
Conversation between 2 Men: 1st man: I am a man of few words. 2nd man: Same here, I am married too!
Wife: There’s trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor. Hubby: Water in the carburetor? That’s ridiculous. Wife: I tell you the car has water in the carburetor. Hubby: You don’t even know what a carburetor is. I’ll check it out. Where’s the car? Wife: In the pool.
There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it. There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbour has it