Heated gold becomes ornaments

Two frinds,who hadn’t seen each other in several years, met on the street. 1st: Who are you working for now? 2nd: Same people, My wife and for children.

I and my girlfriend are having a communication problem. Every time I give her a call, her husband answers the phone!

A young man asks a kind priest: Father is it a sin to sleep with a girl? Father: No my child but the problem is that you guys never sleep.

If I ever go for a brain transplant I’d like to use your brain. It’s not because you are a genius. I would only like a brain that has never been used.

Every organisation is like a tree full of monkeys. Ones at the top can only see monkeys below them and ones at the bottom see only assholes above them.

Nurse: Doctor, the man You have just treated collapsed on the front step what should I do? Doctor: Turn him around so it looks like he was just arriving!