I hate when people tell me

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito to her mother. Yes, but be aware, pay attention during the applause.

Silly horror movie dialogue: Hey, anybody there? As if the ghost gonna reply, I am in the living room! Want a drink?

A two year old girl asked her granny how old she was. However, the granny did not know her age. The kid said to the granny, Don’t stress, read from your panty label, mine is written 2-3 years!

The sergeant-major yelled, Private Philip, I didn’t see you at camouflage training this morning! Philip replied, Thank you, sir.

I and my girlfriend are having a communication problem. Every time I give her a call, her husband answers the phone!

Life is a paradox-what you want you don’t get (love), what you get, you don’t enjoy (marriage), what you enjoy is not permanent (girlfriend), what is permanent is boring (wife).