Woman is afraid of Cockroach

Alcohol is not in my Vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on Whiskeypedia and learnt that if you drink too much of it, you’re Brandyed a Gin in social circles!

Girl’s status on Facebook: ‘Feeling sad!’ 17021 comments. Boy’s status: ‘Going to commit suicide!’ 2 likes and 1 comment – Think about it dude…. Drop the plan, if you can!

Q: What happens to a lawyer who jumps out of a plane at 35,000 feet without a parachute? A: Who cares?

Postman: I have to come five miles to deliver you this packet. Santa: Why did you come so far. Instead you could have posted it.

A student writes a letter via telegram to his dad. It goes… No fun, send mon, your son! Dad write back saying…so sad, too bad, your dad!

How do you know when kids start to grow up? Girls grow up when they start to put lipstick and boys grow up when they start to wipe it off!