If a devil catches your wife

A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl? B: It’s a girl. She’s my daughter. A: Oh, I’m sorry, Sir. I didn’t know that you were her father. B: I’m not. I’m her mother.

Little birds in the sky, You look up and it shits in your eye. You don’t mind and you don’t cry, You just thank God that cows don’t fly.

Customer: There is only one piece of meat in my plate. Waiter: Don’t worry, Sir! I will cut it in two.

God made Pepsi, God made whisky, God made me so sexy, God made rivers, God made lakes and God made you… well everybody makes mistakes.

May our friendship turn into silver, silver into gold, gold into diamonds… and may our diamonds be forever… Then we’ll sell it OK? Fifty-Fifty

There are four animal species a woman needs in her life: Jaguar in her garage, mink in her closet, tiger in her bed and of course a donkey to pay her bills!!