Wife: If I die first, I want you to promise to let my mother ride in the first car with you at the funeral procession. Husband: OK, but it will totally ruin my day!
Wife: Honey, before we got married, you used to give me gifts and expensive jewelry. Husband: Yes… so? Wife: How come you don’t do it anymore? Husband: Have you ever seen a fisherman give worms to the fish after catching it!