True friends stand behind you

I tried Internet dating, but I quickly realized it wasn’t for me when they matched me up with my wife!

The difference between a husband and childbirth is that one can be terribly painful and sometimes almost unbearable, while the other is just having a baby!

Husband: Wow Darling, the house is so clean. Was the Whatsapp server down today? Wife: No. Husband surprised! Wife: Actually, I lost my phone charger and had to put things in place to look for it!

If you are single, remember good things come to people who wait. If you are settled, then settlement is what you get from a separation.

Holiday: It’s a day when a man stops doing what his Boss wants and starts doing what his Wife wants!

Women are like phones, they like to be held, talked to and touched often. But push the wrong button and You are disconnected.