If you never want to see a man again

Friend: How’s your sex life? Man: As usual, Monday to Friday. Friend: What about the weekends? Man: Weekends? Oh! That time I’m at home, relaxing with my wife !

What a contradiction? If wife wants husband’s attention, she just has to look sad and uncomfortable, But if husband wants wife’s attention, he just has to look comfortable and happy!

The secrets of a happy marriage: Open Tools, Go to Internet Options, Clear History, Delete Files, Delete Cookies.

In many countries, a hunting license entitles you to one deer and no more. Just like a marriage license!

Husband before leaving for office to his angry wife, Have a Nice Day! Wife: Don’t tell me what to do!

A man likes his wife to be just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness, and just stupid enough to admire it.