Girl anounced her engagement

Cop: Sir, what’s in the bottle next to you? Driver: It’s water. Cop: Sir, this is wine. Driver: What? Jesus! He did it again!

Teacher: Four beautiful girls are walking on the road. Change it to exclamatory sentence. Student: WOW !

Human-beings get rich as they grow old: Silver in Hair, Gold in Teeth, Sugar in Blood, Precious Stones in Kidney, And a never ending supply of Gas!

Dear Optimist, Pessimist and Realist, While you were arguing about the glass of water, I drank it. Sincerely, The Opportunist

The boss got out of a BMW 5 series and a junior employee remarked, Wow Boss, That’s Great! The boss said, If you also work hard, be punctual, put in more hours of work during the weekends and take fewer holidays, I’ll be able to buy an even better car next year!

News in a local newspaper: 5 boys, aged 23-25 caught in park. They were teasing a 50 years old lady who had gone for a morning walk! Next day, that park was packed with aunties age between 45-55.